I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Michael Bay diarrhea
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Randomize
