thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
