the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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