Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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