we're blogging at a bar
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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