Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
