Say something about gay babies.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Randomize
