I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
