He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
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