I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
