no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Randomize
