No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
