My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
i drank out of a bidet.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
