Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize
