Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
