Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Be still, my beating vagina.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
