Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
