why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize