it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
