I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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