Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
