WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize
