There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Jerry, you need to find god
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
