also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
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