Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
