Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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