someone threw a dead crab at me
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Mom said you looked used
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
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