As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
