She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Randomize
