I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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