I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
