dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Randomize
