Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
