But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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