I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
wow bdsm is so cute
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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