Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
i just had sex bonerless
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Randomize
