Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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