He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Randomize
