Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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