their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
