don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
