is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
