i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Randomize
