found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize
