come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Randomize
