ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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