need another drink. this is the easiest way
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Randomize
