I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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