Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
what is it with giant penises always finding me
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Randomize
