So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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